I really am. I can lose or gain five pounds at the drop of a hat. I still haven't gotten used to it, since it's, well, annoying, but I'm getting better. I didn't pay much attention to this week's weigh in. I had chinese food (super salty but oh so wonderfully tasty) and I was bunkered down with Aunt Flo who was being a MAJOR pain in the ass. So...Yeah, the three pound gain didn't mean all that much to me.
I remembered in my larger days the doctor telling me my period was irregular due to my weight. I think that’s the only thing I miss about my larger days. Periods were few and far between and they did not cause nearly as much pain. No one tells you that in the before and after stories. :/
Spring Break is coming. Well, it's pretty much here. After tomorrow, I'm free for a whole week. I'm excited, but a little worried about working out. I'll have to find something to help me maintain for that time (or, god forbid, lose something). I get to see friends though. And, yeah, I’m gonna eat while I’m with them. :P I’ll look at calories, but I refuse to be that friend that brings everyone down by going, “That’s fattening, blah blah blah.” I know I don’t want to hear it when I’m with my friends for the first time in months.
Today was the first day in a month or two that I was on a spin bike (I stopped once school started because that gym costs money I don't really have). It was kind of fun. Lol. I made up my own little routine with the music that was playing and "pushed" myself. I was sweating like no body's business, and some people were looking at me like, "...relax..." But I felt/feel great! I don't know, but something about a great, sweat filled work out just makes me feel cleansed, relaxed. Usually hungry as well, but relaxed. My body always feels all loose, and my clothes (that aren’t soaked in sweat) feel extra fuzzy and soft.
Oh I could just be insane and hungry, who knows.
I really, really, really want to hit 221 or below before I leave for Arizona (Two months away. It’s a pretty lofty goal, but it’s out in the open now). Like, bad. Really, really bad. Really, really, REALLY, bad. That’s the line when I am no longer obese and just regular overweight. And it would be great, because then I could spend all summer just trying to get below 200. I know that the lower I get, the slower it goes, but I have almost four months there…20 pounds in four months isn’t impossible if I get my head in the game.
Japan is fast approaching, and I want to be as close to my goal weight as possible. I just gotta stay focused. If I come back below 200, I’ll have about 40-ish pounds to lose in about 4 ½ months. Very hard goal, but if I can get to around 20 pounds of my goal, I would consider that a pretty good success for about a year and half of hard work.
But, we’ll just have to see how it goes.
P.S. Is it so hard to give me an A-? I just want a 3.6! 3.56 is like…teasing me! I’m gonna fight for my right to have cum lade. O_O
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